Thursday, September 20, 2012

Shushing the Evil Voices in My Head

I want to slap her so bad...I want to pull her hair and drag her down 24 floors... and I want to stab him right in the face, between his eyes. I want to take his lighter and... OK. I think now is the right time I stop sharing some of the many thoughts that shuffle through my wide imagination while having to deal with some of the 'annoying' people I meet every now and then.

There's not one single day that passes without me repeating these words over and over again. Trying so hard to picture these horrifying images to help me relax and survive these dreadful moments. But lately I was wondering, what if I simply stop deciphering their actions and words and just listen? Not react, but rather  l-i-s-t-e-n. And so I started adopting this 'technique' lately... But no, nothing has changed. I was still finding the same people 'annoying'. I wasn't going to quit. I decided to take it to another level. 

I started thinking about all the  people  that find me annoying (very few of course) and it occurred to me, what appeals as annoying to me might not be annoying to others. I decided to give 'accepting others' as they are a chance believing that nothing is impossible. I set my mind to it. I woke up in the morning thinking that today, no matter what, I'm not going to interpret anyone's words or actions. I will receive them as they are, even if they irritate and annoy the hell out of me!  This was a couple of weeks ago. I started accepting the just be method i.e. if I want to be, then I should accept others to just be no matter how they act or what they say. 

I'm not saying that this has been an easy process...not at all actually! I'm still living the process...accepting its circumstances with all its ups and downs to help me get to what I want...I want to be happy...I want to be joyful...I want to be energetic... I want to achieve my goals and live my passions... I want to just be.



  1. This is some interesting stuff Mariam! It is good that you are analyzing this whole process and thinking about it IMO. Heik shway shway u seem to be simplifying your life o inshAllah this will give u less headaches and less angry thoughts overall. As you said it is difficult as it is a big change bs keep it up, we'll be supporting you and rooting for you ^^ God bless, have a good day! - Fady Kiriakides

  2. Thank you very much Fadyyy...I realize it's a long procedure but I'm on it ^_^
    Thanks for the support <3 I hope my posts add something to your life :)

  3. U r most welcome ya Mariam :D! As long as u r on it inshAllah u will do very well :)! Glad to support u and i look forward to reading ur future posts!